grapes, grapes, and . . . Dave

Wine
Four hundred pounds of grapes later we are well into our second year of wine making. A month ago we bottled nearly 75 bottles of merlot, this year we are increasing the amount to probably 75 bottles of cabernet franc, 20 bottles of port, and an unknown number of bottles of zinfandel and pinot grigio. Someone recently told me that making wine "sounds like something I would do." I think I'll take that as a compliment. But the winemaking is more Big J's thing than it is mine. I am more into the wine drinking aspect of the whole thing. Although there is something to be said for standing in a big vat of grapes with your husband and your daughter holding hands, laughing, stomping, and feeling the warm fruit beneath your barefeet as the slight chill of the first fall air blows across the yard.

Dave
On Saturday night we went to see the Dave Matthews Band last concert of the summer. Now I know it is really fall. As we stood listening to the band, Big J turned to me and said, "Can you actually believe we are here?" And I knew exactly what he meant: here listening to DMB in their hometown; here living in Charlottesville, Virginia, 2,500 miles from our last home; here in this tenth year of marriage that at one point we wondered if we would make it to; here without family, making it on our own; here in a doctoral program; here with our amazing daughter; here surrounded by a community of friends.

We have been listening to DMB since the beginning, and for us they seem like one of the perfect summer bands. We've been to many concerts (although not enough to make us seem crazy), we've bought the new CDs the day they were released, listened to song after song without tiring of their sound. The images of concerts past have stayed with us: seeing the sun set behind the band in The Gorge, the 16 hour trek from Oregon to Boulder with my best girlfriend while Big J stayed home and played travel agent searching for hotels in cities throughout Wyoming and Colorado, little j's first "concert" in-utero, "Ozzfest!" The images are like a map of ten years of marriage.

We both grew up in rural, small town Oregon, met in college and married shortly after graduation. Like most of our friends, we were happy living in that small town raising a family, content with our careers, active community members, surrounded by family and lifelong friends, growing old together. It was hard to imagine a better life when we were in the midst of that one. But I think we both longed for something different, and as our partnership changed and developed we began to look beyond the comfortable.

It is easy to say now, looking back, that Big J and I were destined for more than life in our small college town. And perhaps it is destiny that brought us to Charlottesville. All I know is that I am happier than I have ever been in my life. And maybe in some small way I can thank Dave for that.....

Celebrate we will
Because life is short but sweet for certain
We're climbing two by two
To be sure these days continue
These things we cannot change